Steve @rantingsteve@interfaith.masto.host

"The Teachings of Ram Dass" on Gaia.com. Today's episode is "Fellow Addicts" - I can't quote the entire thing, but it is the perfect expression of gratitude.
"We are addicted to the shared feeling that there is the possibility that we could be free."

Thich Nhat Hanh just passed.

I should be freaking out right now.
I should be nearing burn out by now.

The worst I'm having is moments of feeling overwhelmed, which subside into calm reassurance.

It all has me feeling rather confused, but in a good way.

My perception of reality has changed; I think for the better. I'm not angry anymore.
Accepting that some days I'm not going to be able to be productive, and having faith that somehow, things will work out. Accepting that I'm doing what I can when I can without burning myself out. Giving myself time to recover and heal from past trauma. Not holding myself accountable to anyone but myself.
Some days will still be very difficult. Some days I will not be okay. And that's okay.

Rider-Waite-Smith isn't my go-to deck, but it's a good deck for taking these sorts of pictures because it's both colorful and in the public domain.

I took a couple of pictures for one of my websites, and I was so happy with how they came out I threw them up on unsplash.com.

Coffee.
The roof over my head.
A working furnace.
Ideas for generating income.
A calm inner reassurance about the future.

Woke up this morning and got straight to work. Had a fairly productive day before taking the cat to the vet.
Coffee.
Made a yummy bean soup, which was very satisfying on a day like today.
Reese's Pieces. ("Get out of my Store, Jim!")

The luxury of being physically tired and not having to drive anywhere and being able to work at my own pace.
Coffee.
That I don't remember all the things that happened in the past 3 years.
Validation of my life choices, and respect and support from people who matter to me.

"All shall be well,
and all shall be well,
and all manner of things shall be well"
- Julian of Norwich

I'm thankful for music. I'm thankful that I can feel a certain way, and find a song that helps me to process that feeling more fully.
I'm thankful that I've gotten over a difficult slump and I'm motivated and actually getting work done, in January, and in spite of Seasonal Affective Disorder.

Did I just record a video talking about the Tarot and how it relates to cybersecurity?

Yes, yes I did.

Something clicked once again in watching Ram Dass videos on Gaia, both in terms of making a peace with my past, and reaffirming that I'm on the right path now, both professionally and spiritually.
I'm thankful for the rush of inspiration I've experienced in developing content, killing my editor, and finding the confidence to put myself out there.

Mother-in-law has added me to her Gaia account. So much good stuff to watch!

I'm thankful to have reached out to that friend I mentioned yesterday, and we're going to Zoom this week and catch up.
I'm thankful that I took some time to watch some videos on narcissism this weekend, and got a better understanding of what happened in that friendship I had to end.

When I was homeless just after leaving my ex-husband, there were friends who kept me off the street. Of those friends, there's only one that I'm still friends with. She is such a beautiful soul and I'm so thankful that she's in my life.

1. Playne meditation game, which helps me stay disciplined about daily meditation.
2. My husband, the most supportive and wonderful person I've ever been blessed to have in my life.
3. The freedom to work for myself doing something I believe in and am passionate about.
4. Coffee.
5. My home, and the very real prospects of fixing it up this year.
6. Being in the incredibly privileged position of not having to leave the house for anything at this moment.

Trying to get into a habit of remembering and expressing gratitude for the good things in my life.

Me: Today is gonna be a good day.
Tarot: 10 of Swords
Me: Oh, come on!

As a former Catholic, one of my favorite things to do is to find a statue or shrine dedicated to the BVM and offer prayers to Brigid. I suspect both Mary and Jesus would approve.